5x5 rule

5 X 5 Rule – 5 Ways of Letting Go


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 I once read the following quote:

“If it’s not going to matter in 5 years then don’t spend more than 5 minutes being upset about it”.

Too often I have allowed the small injustices to hold me back from moving forward in my life. This is one of the ways that I have become stuck. Once stuck it can be difficult to get unstuck.  The truth is, life is not always fair and I will not always be treated fairly.  I have a choice to make when life throws me a curve ball of unfairness and that is either embrace it and see where it takes me or I can have a temper tantrum and fight it.  If only I could say that I always choose to embrace it.  Sadly, I don’t .  Too often I will have a temper tantrum and stomp my feet and cry and let others know just how much of an injustice I am experiencing.  Oh, how grateful I am for the patience, understanding and forgiveness of God.

If it’s not an injustice that holds me back or gets me stuck, it can be the small annoyances and frustrations that can get me right in a “mood”.  You know the ones? The times when you  are  running late and get stuck behind a very slow driver. Or when you go to put a load of laundry in the washer only to find someone else has left his in the washer and now You have to do two loads. This one gets me all the time, the missing toilet paper on the toilet paper roll. I could go on and on, but I am sure you get my point.  If you’re anything like me, you have allowed the small stuff to take big chunks out of your time, your energy, your peace of mind and thus your life.

Lately I have been working on letting go. I am working on not allowing the small things to wreck my day. I am working on acceptance in all things. Life is truly short and the reality is that I can spend it miserable and negative or I can put things into perspective. There are too many important issues that require my attention that get left behind as my focus is on the issues that in the scheme of things really don’t matter.

Let it go


5 Ways to Let Go of the Small Stuff

1. Take a deep breath

This allows me to clear my brain and is a sign that I need to refocus.

2.  Commit to keeping my mouth shut 

Sometimes the best thing to do and the hardest thing to do is to be silent.  One of my best coping skills has been to learn how to respond to situations instead of reacting to them.  If I think before I speak, I can save myself from a whole lot of extra stress.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words” – Proverbs 18:21 amp

Be quiet

3.  Be mindful of my thoughts

I am a firm believer that my thoughts control my life. If I focus on all the negative, then that is all that I am going to see. Often a refocusing of my thoughts is all that I need to move on from the small annoyances and frustrations in life.

‘”For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor your ways My ways,” declares the Lord’ – Isaiah 55:8

4. Put on an attitude of gratitude 

This requires action.  I need to be intentional in being grateful.  When I am focused on looking for the things in my life that I am grateful for, the little things don’t  seem to faze me as much.  This is a daily event for me, I wake up actually looking for things to be grateful for.

“In every situation [no matter what the circumstances] be thankful and continually give thanks to God; for this is the will of God for you in Christ” – 1 Thessalonians 5:18


5.  Pray

The Lord gives me peace and He gives me comfort. When I am anxious and I turn to Him, He calms my mind.  He also gives me guidance and direction if I ask for His assistance.  Prayer is not a magic wand and I get what I want, it’s communicating to the One that loves me the most. I am able to be authentic when I pray. He wants to hear all about my feelings and then He wants to give me peace.  When I vent to others it can lead to greater problems, but when I vent to God it leads to solutions and peace.


“Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know  my heart; Test me and know  my anxious thoughts; And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way” – Psalm 139:23-24 amp

“Be still before the Lord; wait patiently for Him and entrust yourself to Him; Do not fret (whine, agonize) because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who carries out wicked schemes” – Psalm 37:7 amp

“The Lord will give [unyielding and impenetrable] strength to His people; The Lord will bless His people with peace” – Psalm 29:11

“Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God.” – Philippians 4:6

Be Free

Lastly, I look to see if there are any blessings in my injustices, annoyances and frustrations. Often when I have a change in my perception and my attitude I am able to see that God has used these things for my own good. Whether it means He has saved me from a potential accident, injury or harm. Sometimes it’s that He has used these things to teach me about, compassion, empathy, understanding, love, patience and/or forgiveness.  I know that if I dwell on the small stuff I feel imprisoned by my own emotions. Once I work at letting it go — I feel free.

5x5 rule

I am am grateful that God loves me enough to challenge me.

Be blessed 💞💞💞



49 thoughts on “5 X 5 Rule – 5 Ways of Letting Go”

  1. All of these are great tips. I think keeping silent sometimes is SO important. I’ve been trying that lately and I believe it has really benefited me in my marriage especially lol. Sometimes just have to let things roll off and pick your battles. Great post!

  2. Hi Shelley!
    Oh yes, you are not alone! I also tend to get riled up when things are not the way I want them. It also inspired me a post on what to do when you get annoyed easily. Mindfulness and the gratitude exercise have also helped me a lot. Furhtermore I still work on being more accepting, i.e. accept that things are not always as I want them to be and people won’t always behave as I would like them to.

  3. I really liked this blog post. I’m going through some stuff in life where I just need to let go and let God. It’s really hard to do that though sometimes. I pray a lot about it so I know God knows what I’m going through regardless of whether I pray about it, but he REALLY knows what is going on the amount I talk to him. =)

  4. Amen! God always gives us peace when we open up to Him and share our struggles with Him, and He gives us joy when we focus on the blessings that He continues to give us. It’s so hard sometimes to stay focused when we don’t get what we want, but He is very patient with us and waits for us with arms wide opened. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!

  5. Speaking Bipolar

    Letting go is something I am ALWAYS working on. (Cue the Disney song here.) I agree prayer is a big help, especially if the thing I am stuck on is someone who hurt me. Pray not only for peace but also for the offending party. It’s hard to stay upset with someone when you are asking God to bless them. Great post!

    1. When I am upset or hurt or angry with someone I try to make a commitment to pray for them every day for 21 days. Pray for them what I would want myself. The first few days can be tough but after awhile the heaviness lifts. Blessings to you

  6. sometimes it seems that we can never let those feelings go and yet we know if we do not we are only hurting ourselves. I know that the tips you share work as I have used them before as well thanks for sharing

  7. One thing I have learned a while ago is that you should never react straight away when something happens and you should never take important decisions in the heat of the moment. It’s better to take a deep breath, “park them away” and come back to them when your mind is clear and emotion-free.

  8. Letting go is something that definitely needs practice, and it has taken me years to finally come in terms with “let go”. I guess it gets difficult only when we set expectations. Thanks for your post, needed a reminder.

  9. This is usually the hardest thing for me to do as much as I try to let go I keep on holding to things that don’t really benefit me in any way shape or form. I need to really work on it.

  10. Great tips. Some of them are diffcult to indulge -such as keeping mouth shut. But I agree with you. It is easier to change our attitude and change ourself, than to expect from someone else.

  11. There’re lots of important things that matter in life so it’s vital that we can ignore all the absurd trivial stuff. I’m learning to live lightly on everything now. Thanks for your post!

  12. Point number 2. Commit to keeping my mouth shut – I definitely need to learn more of this. Sometimes it’s just so hard to keep it under control..

  13. I loved this article . It is a great reminder to not let the small stuff . Heck to not let anything destroy our peace . Sometimes It is easier said than done but taking deep breaths and moments to reflect really do work wonders for me in any tense situations. Adjusting your focus and training yourself to let your energy flow towards the things that are going right is also very beneficial .

  14. Oh my, oh my, keeping my mouth shut is the really hard part… Great tips though, we are all a work in progress, Gods grace is always sufficient

  15. My anger probably hurts me more than it hurts others, but I’m working on not complaining about things that don’t matter. Nobody likes a complainer. Also I agree, it helps to focus on the things we are grateful for.

  16. What a blessing to read this encouraging, yet challenging post this morning. I am so thankful for the Lord’s mercies which are new every morning! Great is His faithfulness! Thinking on what is true and right is so key because when we focus on the negative, our actions become negative. Thank you for writing out these wonderful reminders! Pinned!

  17. I love these tips. And I can honestly admit that keeping my mouth shut will probably prove to be the most difficult for me. I am notorious for letting people know when they’ve done something to ruffle my feathers. But it makes no sense to get so enraged over such small things. It’s never progressive and doesn’t ever change what happened either. This is a great post!

  18. Being mindful of one’s thoughts is very important. That will dictate how we react to situations and our decision to move on. Your post is enlightening.

  19. Great advice. I am definitely guilty of getting het up by little things that really don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Will try to follow your advice!

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